Moll (After Kincaid) ~ fiction by Richie Narvaez

Take the loot from the Saturday night knockover and lock it in the box; wash the stash on Sundays at the track and glom a little for yourself and stuff it into the mattress; never leave the house without one of the fellas; fry up eggs in butter, not oleo, and make a lot more toast that you think you’ll need; always keep your dress perfumed; if you buy yourself a new purse, make sure it’s got secret pockets, if not sew in secret pockets, because you’re going to need ’em; soak shirts in milk to get out the bloodstains; say, you didn’t talk to that copper O’Reilly, did you?; never finish the food that’s on your plate or else the gunsels will call you a pig and have a laugh; at the speakeasy try to act like a lady for once and not like the red-light floozy you really are; never talk to no stinkin’ coppers; on top of that, never talk to stinkin’ snitches, not even to ask for a light; don’t drink any old bubbly sitting around—it could be a mickey; but I don’t talk to the coppers or snitches at all and I certainly never did at the clubhouse; this is how to sew up a stab wound; this is how to make a bandage for the stab wound you just sewed up; this is how you do dance slow with a man without looking like the red-light floozy I know you are and who you’re always gonna be; this is how you hide a gat so’s it don’t make a bulge; this is how you starch your man’s best shirts so that he never sees a crease and backhands you one for it; this is where you get hop—far from the house, because you don’t want your man to know; this is how you ditch the fellas before you go get good and gowed-up; once the hop hits you, this is how you vomit so’s you don’t get it on your shoes; this is how you shop; this is how you shop on credit when things get tight; this is how you stretch a sack of potatoes over a month; this is how you make friendly with the corner grocer you don’t like too much; this is how you make friendly with the corner grocer you don’t like at all; this is how you make friendly with the corner grocer’s wife who ain’t gonna like you no matter how you try, so why bother; always cross your legs and act like a lady—and don’t ever think you’re a hot shot or criminal or a gangster, you rube; all that is his business and let the rotten bum keep it; this is what you put inside yourself so you don’t get knocked up, because if you get knocked up you’ll be on the street being the red-light floozy again; this is who you go to to take care of things when you do get knocked up; always take care of things out of town, so the neighbors don’t see nothing; don’t make eyes at the doc or at anyone, because believe you me it’ll get back to your man; this is how to make a martini; this is how to make a gin rickey; this is how to make a gimlet; this is how to cure a hangover; this is how to soak your head after a bad batch of bathtub gin; this is how to cure a bad dose of hop, but you gonna have to count on one of us gals because your man won’t want to know about it; this is how to settle down a gunsel, and if this doesn’t work there are other ways; this is how to chiv someone if it comes to that, and this is how you use those famous getaway sticks of yours so maybe you live to see tomorrow; this is what you tell your parents when they ask what how you’re doing in the big city; always use your teeth to check oyster fruit to make sure it’s the Real McCoy; but what if my man don’t give me no oyster fruit?; you really gonna sit there and tell me that you’re gonna to be the kind of dame stays with a bum don’t give her no goddamn oyster fruit?

Richie Narvaez is the author of two novels and two short story collections. More at www.richienarvaez.com.