Lemon Garnished Fried Phish Stories ~ poetry by Gerard Sarnat

“In the movies the pirañas eat the people, in reality the people eat the pirañas.” — Peruvian Amazon guide After being interviewed May 2, 2018, a former Trump aide told CNN* about Bob Mueller’s team, “It’s clear they are still really focused on Russia collusion,” Michael Caputo said, adding, “They know more about [the President’s]… Read More Lemon Garnished Fried Phish Stories ~ poetry by Gerard Sarnat

My Little Chickadee ~ poetry by Robert Beveridge

Flounce skirted stranger orders a bourbon, stares only at a reflection between the bottles. Nate the piano player pounds out “Honolulu Baby” even though Hawai’i will not be discovered for a dozen years. “Sandwich Island Baby” doesn’t sound as good, I guess. The two brothers sit beyond the ell, toss back kamikazes, bet which one… Read More My Little Chickadee ~ poetry by Robert Beveridge

11 Dreams of Weird Societal Offerings ~ poetry by Marion Deutsche Cohen

(1) WEIRD AIRPLANE It’s a local. It makes landings in every major city. They announce the stops beforehand, both over the intercom and on those silly mini-TV’s that drop down in that pretentious way. However, if nobody pulls the cord it skips that stop. So watch and listen carefully. Check your schedule frequently. Don’t get… Read More 11 Dreams of Weird Societal Offerings ~ poetry by Marion Deutsche Cohen

Sam’s Seven Bowls of Wrath: a Ghazal ~ poetry by Ann Stewart McBee

Semis pass us like angry marked beasts. A zit on my chin festers and throbs. Already I see red. Pastor Pete mouths along with Revelation on cassette.  I picture Henry Rollins and see red. With feeling, the solitary refinement of your room spits you back out, I’ll practice saying instead. This bed and breakfast smells… Read More Sam’s Seven Bowls of Wrath: a Ghazal ~ poetry by Ann Stewart McBee

Parade, a documentary: Shot List ~ lost production notes by Jake Sheff

Jake Sheff is a major and pediatrician in the US Air Force, married with a daughter and three pets. Currently home is the Mojave Desert. Poems of Jake’s are in Radius, The Ekphrastic Review, The Brooklyn Review, The Cossack Review and elsewhere. He won 1st place in the 2017 SFPA speculative poetry contest and was… Read More Parade, a documentary: Shot List ~ lost production notes by Jake Sheff

Carina Estellovich’s Baggage ~ fiction by Natalie Plotkin

Carina Estellovich is a twenty-four-year-old poet living in Seattle, Washington. She doesn’t break necks, but she also isn’t mistakenly sat on in malls. All around, Carina is average. One might even unmaliciously and objectively call her shallow. Indeed, the aphorism “what you see is what you get” very nearly describes Carina in full. It is… Read More Carina Estellovich’s Baggage ~ fiction by Natalie Plotkin

Coordinator of the Mother Daughter Relations Department ~ job listing by Tara Lemma

COORDINATOR OF M.D.R. JOB OVERVIEW With a role in the M.D.R. department, you will have the opportunity to cultivate a meaningful relationship with your Mother. Time management skills are preferred, as she will remind you each day that your time together is short. You will feel there has never been anything longer. You will be… Read More Coordinator of the Mother Daughter Relations Department ~ job listing by Tara Lemma

Minutes from the March Meeting of the University Library Committee on Workshops ~ document by Jennifer Gravley

Minutes from the March Meeting of the University Library Committee on Workshops Rejected Library Workshops for Students How to Push in a Chair When Bad Things Happen to Good Staplers Things You Can Ask Google How to Pick a Printer from the Drop-down List of Printers Rejected Library Workshops for Faculty Here Are Two Databases… Read More Minutes from the March Meeting of the University Library Committee on Workshops ~ document by Jennifer Gravley

That Guy ~ fiction by Lori Cramer

Tip: Pause the slide show to read at your own pace. Lori Cramer’s short prose has appeared in Fictive Dream, L’Ephemere Review, Riggwelter, Unbroken Journal, and Whale Road Review, among others. Links to her work can be found at loricramerfiction.wordpress.com. Twtter: @LCramer29. Show Lori some love via PayPal at bulldog29(at)msn(dot)com.

Dough!

The Disappointed Housewife is delighted to announce our first payment to writers thanks to the generosity of the readers. Last month I created a “starving artists” fund, to which readers can make donations via PayPal. A convenient “donate” button is located in the sidebar to the right. And since the fund’s creation, we’ve collected a… Read More Dough!

Found Poetry in a Technical Manual ~ poetry by Phillip McCollum

The Problem is Casual As you learned, The Problem is casual. Where you throw Fragments can help Tame the luck If you want to create. Focus on, Kings to distinguish. Interesting, Personal thoughts. Categories, Content, Images, Audio, Video, Tags, Overcomplicate. Phillip McCollum is finally figuring out what he wants to be when he grows up,… Read More Found Poetry in a Technical Manual ~ poetry by Phillip McCollum

Help Pay Our Writers With a Donation to The Disappointed Housewife

When The Disappointed Housewife launched, I tried to think of ways the contributors could get paid when I had no budget. I landed on the idea of PayPal “tips” made by readers directly to the writers. But this is a hit-and-miss approach and probably leaves most of the writers with little or no acknowledgment. I… Read More Help Pay Our Writers With a Donation to The Disappointed Housewife

We’re Different Things to Different People ~ fiction by Kevin Brennan

We’re different things to different people. Someone I know, though now dead, is a saint in one woman’s mind. That’s because that woman inherited the dead person’s house, worth probably two million dollars. That woman was the dead person’s step-daughter. She came into the person’s life as a hitchhiker, basically, hitching on her father’s coattails.… Read More We’re Different Things to Different People ~ fiction by Kevin Brennan

Five Poems Found in the Database of the UC Berkeley Library ~ poetry by Glenn Ingersoll

Love is    Love is a dog from hell Love is a four letter word        Love is a many splendored thing    Love is a pie Love is a place          Love is colder than death    Love is the crooked thing Love is the measure        Love is the silence      Love is the sum of it all * We… Read More Five Poems Found in the Database of the UC Berkeley Library ~ poetry by Glenn Ingersoll

Self as Map, as Land ~ poetry by Laura Madeline Wiseman

You’ve never taken Sparta Road    or kept an austere house. On Lone Pine Mountain,    you’ve never stood alone or climbed its high roads    to the peak above Virtue Flat. You’ve never stayed in Bates,    where the directory notes no hotel, all lodging primitive.    Days from now in Baker City you won’t eat one baked cake,… Read More Self as Map, as Land ~ poetry by Laura Madeline Wiseman

Mad Marx’s Post-Modern Post-Apocalypse ~ fiction by Barlow Adams

At the end of the world, with civilization in ruin, Mad Marx’s cell phone rang again. The words “unknown caller” flashed across a screen that was cracked and scratched from an Armageddon that even an Otterbox couldn’t fully defend against. Despite the mystery, Mad Marx knew who it was–he only got one kind of call… Read More Mad Marx’s Post-Modern Post-Apocalypse ~ fiction by Barlow Adams

Thoughts ~ poetry by Alexandra the Great

Alexandra is from a po’ dunk town in central Florida. Her poetry was featured in The Wolfian twice, as well as The Zombie Logic Review, 8 West Press, Over Watch Press, and most recently, appeared in two separate issues of Torrid Literature. She released her first published poetry collection, The Angels’ Trumpets, last year thanks to Purple Unicorn Media.… Read More Thoughts ~ poetry by Alexandra the Great

取り除き Torinozoki (Deinstallation) ~ poetry by Gregory Kimbrell

Gregory Kimbrell is the author of The Primitive Observatory (Southern Illinois University Press, 2016), winner of the 2014 Crab Orchard Series in Poetry First Book Award. His poems have appeared or are forthcoming in Manticore—Hybrid Writing from Hybrid Identities, Alcyone, Whatever Our Souls, Parentheses, Blackbird, and other publications. He is the events and programs coordinator… Read More 取り除き Torinozoki (Deinstallation) ~ poetry by Gregory Kimbrell